Thursday, March 13, 2008

it's a hard pill to swallow...

no really, my B-complex vitamins really ARE hard pills to swallow. they're massive and yellow and taste like dirt. but metallic dirt. not the dirt that grows carrots for example... at least that dirt smells good. (i'd also like to point out that my fingers are possessed, and EVERY time that i just typed out DIRT, i spelled DIRTY first, and had to erase the Y. you care, don't lie.)

i'm doing it. i'm in my health kick zone. i've started taking my vitamins, i'm drinking my protein shakes in the morning (although 20g of protein every morning really frightens me when i think of how long it's now going to take my body to push out poop...aka forever), doing my pilates, bringing my gymbag to work, going tanning (believe me, slightly tanned skin makes things a lot easier when it comes to staring at yourself in the mirror naked), and adopting an overall healthy lifestyle.

except i'm now reading the label on the back of my B-complex vitamin bottle. who needs 3333% the daily value of thiamin? or 2941% the daily value of riboflavin. 2941 is an awfully precise number... how do you KNOW? and what is thiamin even good for?

oh how i love wikipedia:

Thiamine plays an important role in helping the body metabolize carbohydrates and fat to produce energy. It is essential for normal growth and development and helps to maintain proper functioning of the heart and the nervous and digestive systems. Thiamine is water-soluble and cannot be stored in the body; however, once absorbed, the vitamin is concentrated in muscle tissue.

ummm yes please. i'd like my steak medium rare please, with a side of thiamin!!

this is also another side effect of healthy living, tanning skin, and glimpses of sunshine. i turn into my summertime spastic self. lord help us.

17 comments:

Mike said...

Protein makes you poo less often?

Really?

That's scary. I eat a good amount of protein, and I'm, well, how do you say.... extremely regular.

Regular enough to make bunged up people extremely jealous.

I wonder what would happen if I cut protein out of my diet?

Scary thoughts.

new york dactyl said...

i should amend that... it makes ME have a hard time pooing. at least protein shakes do.

my body is weird... seriously.

K said...

Why oh why do vitamins taste like total crapola!

Give me Flintstones multi-colored anyday over those horsepills.

Hillary said...

I hate the taste of vitamin B. I hate the way it hits me at the back of my throat. That horrible, unnatural vitamin B taste.
However, vitamin B is magic - before you go to sleep after a night of drinking, pop 1 vitamin B (2 if tequila has been involved) and you'll be hang-over free in the morning.

Anonymous said...

Sumertime selves are always the best.

Anonymous said...

i hate taking vitamins but it's necessary. i notice a marked difference in how much i get sick from when i'm not taking a one-a-day to when i am.

and girl... tanning is NOT part of a healthy lifestyle!!!! you know i'm no role model for healthy living, but i see you (rightfully) give people a hard time for smoking cigarettes when, really, one tanning session a week is JUST as dangerous as social smoking! i'm not telling to you to stop (yet... wait til i get that medical degree) but let's not pretend that just because it makes you feel better to look in the mirror it's somehow good for your body.

new york dactyl said...

although i absolutely agree with what you're saying arija... having non beluga whale skin color is good for my MENTAL health. everything gives you cancer these days... even breathing the regular air. so dont get me stared about that.

but for me being healthy is about feeling good and looking good... and to get myself there, i lay in the tanning bed for a few weeks before summer hits, and burn my buttcheeks.

plus smoking cigs and tanning are not the same thing, your smoking affects my lungs, my tanning doesn't do a darn thing to you (the general you).

natter away, doesn't mean i'll stop. :)

Shaolin Punk said...

protein helps my bowels move better... juss saying..

Anonymous said...

breathing regular air does not give you cancer. while bodies do naturally progress towards entropy and decay, the attitude that "everything gives you cancer so what does it matter if i go tanning" is really false. i'm not trying to "natter away," and like i said, i'm not saying you should stop. it's true, we all do things that aren't great for us that make us feel good in others ways (though on that note, i haven't had a cigarette in months), but if you're going to make the choice to do something unhealthy, just embrace it! don't try to justify it by saying we're all going to die eventually anyway. i wholeheartedly believe that a little vice looks good on everyone.

Brooke said...

Uh, what happened to the jergens-like fancy self tanner bought?

new york dactyl said...

i bought it... i didn't buy it INSTEAD of the tanning bed. it all just goes together my dear.

JUST ME said...

I hate horse pills.

Those giant vitamins that taste just like you say: like dirt but worse. Trash-dirt.

...also, where do you go tanning? I gotta get my pale ass a LITTLE sun...

Natalie said...

first off... [VERY] moderate tanning is not really so harmful. Light therapy serves all sorts of lovely purposes, and has a positive impact on vitamin d & k production and absorption... which does wonders for mood and metabolism all sorts of things.... just don't go all nuts and get burnt or turn orange or fall asleep in there!

as for protein & pooping... I TOTALLY hear this. I, too, am in some-a-kinda health food mode, and though I prefer chewable protein (ie food) to the drinkable kind (I often save a chicken breast from dinner to have for breakfast if I haven't the time for anything else)... any time I begin to restrict calories, REGARDLESS of fiber intake, poopage suffers. I have no good answer for this... I tend to deal by drinking a bit of beer or wine at least one day a week to move things along....
As for vitamin b.... I don't do complexes because I'm uber sensetive to niacin, but I do take B1, 6 & 12 daily and notice SUCH a diffence in mood & energy when I do not. They say you should take a complex rather than only some B's so as not to throw off your B balance... but I have wonderful results picking and choosing... Don't forget your C&E if aren't getting all your greens / fruit / fish ....

LOVE YOU!!! I'm happy you're back on your kick... it's a lovely place to be. ;)

Natalie said...

haha.... sorry for rambling insanely. It's just that I'm insane. :P

new york dactyl said...

nattie - it's like you get inside my mind!! :)

just me - i go to EZ Tanning. It's on 5th and 20th. not THAT expensive either which is a nice change around here.

Karen said...

You typed D-I-R-T-Y because you ARE dirty.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for writing this.