Thursday, October 25, 2007

the letter j is my nemesis... literally

i dont know what it is about the letter j and it's ability to just tear me to pieces. every emotional breakdown i've had, because of a break up or a relationship gone bad, has mostly had to do with the guy having a name that started with a J (ironically, my best friend's name starts with j... so this is the universe's way of saying that i should really be a lesbian.. bygones).

it happened... AGAIN! even in the briefest of interludes i met a man in this city that was actually interesting, and good looking, and talented.. and passionate about so many things... i was actually excited to get to know him. the first week = magic. three great dates and many hours spent together talking, eating, watching movies, and just getting down to the good stuff. week two = the antithesis and the slow fade. if you don't know me then you aren't fully aware of my 'isms', but the slow fade is something i came up with a few years ago to coin a man's sudden failure to communicate... and slowly and quietly slip out of your life without one of those communicative discussions that could be quite simple if someone just said 'it's too fast' or 'i'm not really into you' or 'i'm an idiot and want to be with someone skinnier and with less of a sense of humor'. who knows what goes on inside of a man's brain, but the 180 slow retreat is the most cowardly move i've ever been privvy to. and yet...it happens to me alot. not a LOT, mind you. but i find that the men i meet just can't seem to be honest about what's going on in their little brains.

and so i'm left a little curious, and a lot of wounded... sort of sad, and pretending that someone i've known for 2.5 weeks doesn't have the capability of reducing me to tears by simply deciding that he's not as excited about me as he was when we first met.

alas... the letter j... you've thwarted me again.
check mate.

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow, it's like you're my horoscope. But ... horoscope in retrospect? What do you call that?

I better get a google identity if I'm going to continue to comment at this rate ...

new york dactyl said...

i'm your retroscope maybe?
sounds pretty fancy...

hanomaly said...

i've been the recipient and have also been guilty of performing the slow fade move....oddly enough, not usually in romantic relationships. and now i just feel damn wicked....


cowardly move indeed.... and yes, questions that need answering. i'm sure you will lick your wounds and proceed with life as usual...... still, i'm sorry.

oh, and j is for jack ass.

Amanda Nelson said...

I don't think it is just men. Most people have trouble being honest when they have a hard truth to communicate. It is cowardly, but I think it is also a question of maturity and experience.

Also, on the bright side, you get to have a nemesis. Which is pretty cool. Now that you are aware of the dastardly outcome in store from any male with a name beginning with J, I suggest you kick them in the shins (apt retribution for crimes certain to be committed) and run away immediately after introductions.

Anonymous said...

stupid fellows.. you know what i have to say about them...

Karen said...

Look on the bright side. At least you didn't make a trip to the other side of the country during Christmas to meet his family only to get the slow fade AFTER you sleep with him. You always have that.

Ryan Scott said...

I think you are missing 1 very important piece here, despite being being hurt. Obviously any guy, or gal should you change teams (KIDDING), that slow fades you obviously isn't worth your time anyway, or your tears. They did you a favor my friend, like it or not. And yes, I know how easy it is to say these things but it's true. Yes it sucks when it happens, but hell, if it didn't happen, you'd have no nemesis. No Nemesis=No Super Hero

jennifer summer said...

*sigh* I've so been there. All the toads we have to kiss before we get to the Prince. No wonder chicks wear so much lip gloss. We need it!

xo

jennifer summer said...

@ mishka -

Hindscope, maybe? ;-)

new york dactyl said...

@RYAN!!!

"No Nemesis=No Super Hero"

that was tres brilliant... i'm saving that. you win some sort of prize today i think.

@JSumm

i think i piddled... too funny.

Karen Picard Kahn said...

cowards... blech. better to find out now than after you've gotten more involved, though...

my take is this... you're a strong, sexy, independent, sexy, intelligent, sexy, beautiful, sexy, creative, sexy, successful, sexy, funny, sexy, intuitive, sexy woman. guys who have self esteem issues, and big egos etc are gonna find that intimidating. and thus the cowardly slow fade...

sooo, sweet t, we need to find you a REAL man. tis all. hehe... ;p

Anonymous said...

not only is he a dick, but he's giving the letter J a bad rap!!! it's my favorite letter in my name!!

maybe THAT j should take a page from my j... should be seen and not heard.