Tuesday, July 17, 2007

i'm on a roll, suckas...

i forgot to mention a random highlight of my night last night... at the alice smith show, after staring at the completely lesbian bass guitarist for most of the show (having one of those 'i swear i know her' moments), we were later told that they'd asked Meshell Ndegeocello to play. i'm sorry but i LOOOVED meshell back in the day, and jacob had no idea who the hell she was. oddly enough, rakesh forwarded me this article today:

http://popwatch.ew.com/popwatch/2007/07/on-friday-i-too.html

had i known that i had musical access to this woman whilst living in new york, i'd be seeking out her gigs like boobies to a... well... man.

heather also turned me onto this blogger a while ago, and i admit that i'm just now getting around to perusing and LOVING what she has to say... her name is mimi smartypants (http://smartypants.diaryland.com/)... and this particular entry regarding her young daughter amuses me to no end:

NORA ON GENDER

Me [for no reason] Hey Nora, what's the difference between a boy and a girl?
Nora: A boy doesn't have a vagina. And boys are sometimes bigger, so sometimes they can't run so fast.

NORA ON SEXUAL ORIENTATION

She shows me a stenciled Apatosaurus that has been filled in with stripes of colored pencil. "Look at my rainbow dinosaur. Doesn't he look proud?

NORA ON GOAL SETTING

What currently knocks 'em dead on the preschool Comedy Hour is to add body parts to common nouns. Get in the car? Get in the EAR CAR! Ha ha ha ha ha! Get it? No? I guess you're not four years old.

Nora: When I grow up I'm going to make candy in a factory.
Me: Awesome. What kind of candy?
Nora [on the edge of cracking herself up]: KNEE CANDY! No wait, hair candy! [convulsive laughter] No, no, no, no, nose candy. I will make nose candy! Everyone will love my nose candy!
Me: People sure do love nose candy.
Nora: Yeah! They will say, "Do you have any more of that nose candy?" And I'll say, "Yes I do! Come on over!"
Me: You should probably have a cell phone, because sometimes people have some nose candy, and then they go out dancing, and then they want some more nose candy at like four in the morning.
Nora: What?
Me: Nothing.

---mimi smartypants is a long-necked plant-eating dinosaur from the Jurassic period.

carry on lovelies

No comments: