when life gets a little rough and/or tumble... add a little sunshine

dating is hard. it takes a lot out of you... all that being on your best behavior, putting your best foot forward, remembering not to belch in front of someone new (that hasn't yet been introduced to the cacophony of your burps), having to put makeup on and shave your legs, the not so joyous tasks of letting someone down that you like but don't LIKE, and then starting all over again when you realize that the current crew just isn't hitting the high notes... or more to the point, making YOU hit the high notes.

i signed up for another month of match.com... it's payday and i was in the mood. last month garnered 1300 profile views, 212 winks received, 73 emails, 7 first dates, and 3 second plus dates. frightening statistics indeed. i swear i'm going to start saving the gem openers that i'm receiving from some people... just so that we can all giggle later.

since usually winter is a tough time for me, i'm delighted to find that i've stopped biting my nails again and i've got some significant growth going on here. that's good stuff. means that i'm not feeling anxious. the only bad thing about this winter is the beluga like coloring of my skin right now. way to make a girl feel NOT awesome. so i just bought this (the bff from california just introduced me to it last weekend and it's amazing):



there are worse things then being pale and awesome... but tan and awesome is just a little bit better.

mental note: must book plane ticket back to seattle soon so that sugin can fix my roots. spring is soon to hit NYC and i must be prepared for full dactyl shenanigans.

sidewalk etiquette you miniature person wielding an umbrella!!

i am from seattle, washington. i don't know if you're aware of this, but it rains there... sometimes. therefore, i am an AMAZING driver in any kind of precipitation and will not pull out an umbrella on the sidewalk until actual full sized droplets are bouncing on my head with any proximity to each other. if they are five seconds apart, get over it.

so today, as i walked to the dentist for my every-six-month cleaning, i found myself getting more and more annoyed by the douchebags on the sidewalk. here's the thing... if you're short, unless you follow the proper umbrella holding rules, you are going to poke me in the face as you walk by me. LIFT UP YOUR UMBRELLA!!! the tall people will lift theirs up higher, it'll all work out, but avoid pushing your umbrella spokes into other people's faces!! i do not understand how human beings can be so unaware of themselves as they walk down the street. you see the other people around you, don't you? it's even easier to spot them when they are also carrying football field sized bright orange umbrellas. because if you're going to carry an umbrella, CLEARLY you should be able to keep your entire golf cart dry at the same time. imbeciles. stay to the right, keep your umbrella above eye level of the people around you, and everything will be okay.

sidewalk rage is a growing problem in new york city. we must all do our part to make the sidewalks safe. i like my eyeballs, and i'd like to hold on to both of them. i know that's madness, but really.

today was also the first time that i had the opportunity to stand up next to my dental hygienist. usually i'm already sitting down in the chair when she comes in, and she usually leaves to go work on someone else by the time i get up to gather my things. not so this time, because i'd brought in stanley (my night guard) for a quick cleaning.... so as she was finishing him off, i stood up to grab my jacket (and hat and scarf and purse, if we're being thorough). i've always known that she was petite and adorable, but good lord i LOOM over her. she turned around and then tipped her head all the back to look up into my face. we both started laughing. then my dentist came in the room and she's also just as beency.

everywhere i go, i'm surrounded by little people. i'm about to change my name to dorothy and be done with it.

happy gobble gobble week. carry on.