who knew that there's such a thing as too much cucumber...

there's entirely too much cucumber in my salad right now. if you're going to overdo it on the salad fixings, mister chopped salad maker, can't you give me excessive amounts of avocado or something? now THAT i would love.

someone suggested to me over the weekend that mosquitos are attracted to certain blood types. really? REALLY? they discern between my pinot noir worthy A positiveness? well that makes sense... i'd want to suck my own blood, i'm that derrrricious. either way, after attending a bbq on saturday afternoon, i counted TWENTY-TWO squite bites on my lower legs and ankles... and lemme tell ya...they are some itchy em effers. the heat doesn't help either, since it just causes the bites to swell and itch and some more.

a coworker just IMed me to say that there were leftover cupcakes in the kitchen. yes... i just RAN down the hallway. for crying out loud.

also, i was greatly overjoyed to find out that gabriel macht has been cast as the spirit. i even bought the ridiculously horrible 'because i said so' on dvd because he was in it (hurl).

i'm too lazy to tell you stories... instead, please enjoy this video taken last night. i'm exhausted:

i'm a traveling fool...

i was back home in seattle last weekend.. here's a recap of me being awesome:

1. i got to the airport FOUR hours early on wednesday because i brought the wrong itinerary with me.
2. i hit on every guy i met that had a girlfriend. who knows why.
3. i spent an entire day doing absolutely nothing and it was perfection.
4. i picked up a stranger and didn't remember doing so the next day.
5. i took many, many kickassish pictures.
6. i found a dead mouse in a bag of old clothes after exclaiming "this smells like s*%t over and over again until i found it.
7. i took a bath in my mom's new whirlpool bathtub... and found myself up to my nose in bubbles when the water kept agitating the shizz.
8. i fell asleep on the floor of the dallas-fort worth airport waiting for my connecting flight home at 5am. i drooled all over myself.
9. i had maybe the best trip back home that i've had yet.
10. i got a weeeeence of a haircut.

more to follow...

goodbye summer...

it seems so odd to me that it's suddenly august. well tomorrow it'll be august, if we're really being technical. but where did the summer go? i look at all the new yorkers and tourists and what not sweating their asses off with disgruntled looks on their faces... and i'm thinking all that sweat has GOT to be leading to weight loss... but then i look down at my own sweaty body and notice... nope.

life just keeps ticking by... and the more that i think about it, the more i wonder... what the hell am i doing here? not so much here... but HERE. with this life. i walk the sidewalks and have these conversations with myself (in my own head mind you, we wouldn't want people thinking that i'm crazy), and i have these ideas about what direction i think a novel should take, and by the time i'm sitting down again, i've completely forgotten what i would have written down. i so don't want to become one of those writers that walks around everywhere with a tape recorder... but i really might have to do it.

i pay attention to the random bits of information available on the subways... and i've seen this passage many, many times, but for some reason... reading it yesterday sort of stabbed me in the chest. i'm sure you've all seen it somewhere:

"There are roughly three New Yorks. There is, first, the New York of the man or woman who was born there, who takes the city for granted and accepts its size, its turbulence as natural and inevitable. Second, there is the New York of the commuter — the city that is devoured by locusts each day and spat out each night. Third, there is New York of the person who was born somewhere else and came to New York in quest of something ….Commuters give the city its tidal restlessness, natives give it solidity and continuity, but the settlers give it passion." - E.B. White

i agree with this thought wholeheartedly... and it serves as a great reminder for me to continue to be passionate about my life here and what that means. i need to focus on my passions and stop worrying about other unnecessary actions or courses. i write... i photograph... i remember that i am passionate. i am a person of passion.

now if i only i could get laid. :)

a little bit of perfection...

i took a four hour bus ride up to boston on friday afternoon... hungover to the Nth degree.

i drank too much on thursday night. and not too much, where it's one glass and you become the loud obnoxious girl... i became the pathetic CRYING girl. heaven help any people that came in contact with me between the hours of 10pm-1am. BAD. i went to happy hour with a newish friend... happy hour become "come to my friends bday party on the UES with me"... which was really me meeting 80 people named "edward t. so and so the third, brokerage and investment director for blah blah blah and i have a yacht". i try not to be judgemental in general. and who knows what i was so blatantly bitter towards the people that i was meeting. but i was literally uncomfortable. and it showed... and i behaved poorly. no excuses...

and my punishment was four hours on a bouncing peter pan bus up to boston.. with a wailing child behind me, and a woman from who knows where on the east coast repeatedly answering her phone and yelling into the receiver 'eh? i dunno.. i can't see a sign... eh?!" over and over again.

eight hours on a bus, to spend two days with friends, is never enough. i feel gilted. like i want to crawl back into my friend Ms blissfully air-conditioned living room, and pet her cat, and watch cable. drink coffee... eat seafood. take pictures. i got home last night to a sad kitty of my roommates and a SWELTERING apartment. the city in the summertime is oppressive, and i've decided officially that i just don't like it.

HOWEVER, i had such a lovely weekend relaxing and being calm.. in a space with no noise and no expectations... and it was completely perfect.

*shimmie*

i do not LOL... i do not ROFL... i *snot dairy* or *high kick* or *shimmie*... shimmie being my most used "hey that makes me so excited i just gave you a little shimmie emoticon that doesn't exist".

anyway... i got home from work on friday (summer fridays, so i was home by 1pm) and started preparing for the weekend's festivities... aka my housewarming party on sunday and all the chopping and shopping that goes along with making white peach sangria. somehow i managed to also take new pictures of arija... but anyways... as i'm taking out a few bags of garbage and what not, i realize that i've let the door to the apartment close and that i'm without keys to get back in. it was about 1:30... arija would be over shortly... and there i was standing in the hallway with two bags of garbage, a box full of broken glass, and an old tv set. super.

i decide to try and climb out of the hallway window (which was filthy) and spiderwoman climb onto our front balcony. the balcony door was OBVIously locked.. and then i realized that the window a/c unit was sitting in a partially open window. so i clambered up onto the ledge... moved the a/c unit... shimmied through the window back into our apartment and put everything back into place. my black shorts were covered in dust/dirt and my hands left dirty prints on the wall... but i was rather impressed with my own ingenuity and shimmie-ing skills.

woot.

okay okay..i GET it.

we all know that love and i have been fighting... and it's sort of like the universe is telling me something.

i'm sitting at home tonight watching one of my netflix videos (that i swear someone's been stealing from my mailbox since i haven't been getting mail lately)... the title is CASHBACK... and it's charming and witty and just romantic enough without being horribly cheesy. and the music is good. and the story is set in england... so obvi i love it.

anyway... the ending scene... a young couple on the verge of love, run outside into the snow... which has stopped and the snowflakes are suspended mid air... and the closing monologue... and the music.

i get it.



Ben Willis: Once upon a time, I wanted to know what love was. Love is there if you want it to be. You just have to see that it's wrapped in beauty and hidden away in between the seconds of your life. If you don't stop for a minute, you might miss it.